Post by SeekerWing on Oct 4, 2012 16:41:10 GMT -8
Rule #1: All girls look sexy in the rain. You might wonder why this is rule number one. Well, allow me to explain - this rule, is meant as a confidence booster for some people - and sometimes, it's just nice to make people giggle when you proclaim it proudly as your "Rule Number One" of all of life and society. I know I giggle, and I made it. And besides - sure, your hair gets all messed up and clumpy, and your clothes get all clingy, but it gives you that shine, and gives the impression that you aren't any typical 'girl' - you aren't afraid of a bit of mud and water! And also, it proves that you aren't a witch. So.[/blockquote]
But really, this one has a more relevant purpose as well; many of the rules you see here have a literal meaning, as well as a metaphoric one. In this case, 'rain' could be simply another way of saying "That grand shit storm that life throws at you". Let's face it - if you were a guy, or if you are a guy, would you rather be with a girl that has absolutely no life, or a girl that actually has a goal in life? And if you chose the first one, you are a sad, twisted little man. So just remember - this 'rain' just makes you that much more fucking awesome.
Rule #2: Trust nobody. Sure, this one sounds a bit Jaded - but trust can only take you so far. Let's face it - people are assholes. You trust somebody to return your pencil in class? Chances are, you'll never see it again. And if you do, they probably chewed on it. Yes, it's great to be friendly, but there are definite boundaries - you have to make sure you're prepared to hold yourself up before you let them do all the work. This also works in reverse - trust nobody, and don't expect to be trusted. Plans fall through; trust fails. Those trust fall practices? Every once in a while, you'll get caught on the ground. Bet you'll feel really dumb for falling over after that, no won't you? People won't always be there to catch you, and if they are, you can't rely on that - because shit happens. (See Rule #11)
Rule #3: No, they don't want to help you. How many times have you made a phone call to a company of some sort and had them actually go out of their way to help you? You hear a lot about companies who's customer care service is oh so wonderful, how they actually want to help you, to make you feel valued and all that bullshit, right? Well, let's face it - that's not the norm, and you can't go in expecting that. Sometimes, you've gotta have a bit of a bitch fight with people to get what you need - and this doesn't just apply to the people on the phone, either. Self interest is a running theme in humanity (and in Econ class), and it is not in most people's self interest to help you out. You have to work for this shit - but man, is it worth it in the end.
Rule #4: Assume nothing. Even the most obvious things can be pretty damn deceiving. A little bit of paranoia is healthy - it's a survival tool. Don't assume that that little kid is smart enough not to charge out in the road in front of your car; that ends badly. Don't assume that that man in the Wal-Mart parking lot isn't eying you because he wants you to be his next victim - though most people would like to believe that that's a safe assumption to make. This rule kind of goes hand in hand with Rule #13. Everything varies, and you can't assume that something will be the same simply because it always has been in the past. Once upon a time, this is why people believed the sun would rise every day - it always had in the past, why would it stop now? Well, now we know the science behind it, but before then there was really no proof that the sun would rise. Those old stories that believed the sun was a living entity? What if the sun decided to sleep in that day? While the example may be a bit far fetched, it should illustrate the point nicely. This rule indicates the need to a slightly scientific - and paranoid - mindset.
Also - never assume that people understand what you're thinking, and never assume that you understand what they're thinking. Some pretty grand misunderstandings can come from this way of living. Assumptions lead to pain, in the end - and often, only for one of the people involved. You don't want to be that person, now do you? Call it self defense if you will, but assumptions go to bad places.
Rule #5: Never stop running. The race doesn't end just because you took a break to walk. In fact, not only did it keep going, but you fell behind, lost time, and you know all those sores that build up when you run? Yeah, you're gonna feel them that much more keenly when you start again. Don't believe me? Go run two miles, walk for a block, and run two more. If that's too much, go run a lap around a track, walk for... Say, a quarter of a lap? Less, probably... And run another lap.
Now, you can take this one as literally as you want - but metaphorically, it has some pretty deep meaning. Just like a race, life goes on - too fast. The whole universe moves too fast - we're just trying to keep up. And if you stop running? You're going to get left in the dust. Basically, this rule comes down to one thing; you have to stay on top of life. And yes, I did paraphrase there, to those of you who caught that - paraphrasing gets a lot of great points across, you know? Anyway, I'm serious - this is another way to say "Never Give Up", because once your out, getting back in is pretty damn hard.
Rule #6: Don't forget to breath. You know, it's really hard to run when you aren't breathing. Want a fast mile without air? You might get a fast stitch, but I can guarantee that your mile speed ain't gon be that great.
And yes, you've probably guessed where this is going - the metaphorical. I've already compared life to a race, I may as will do it again. Every year in cross country, we have a special practice - an event called the ten mile challenge. This, my friends, is a long run. Ten miles to be exact. Like the ten mile challenge, life has this tendency, when it's not giving out lemons, to go on and on and on. And every one in a while, you've got to stop focusing on the run, and take a nice series of deep breathes. We recommend three steps in, two steps out, and a recovery step. But in all seriousness, sometimes you gotta let life know that it's long and monotonous ways are killing you. Find a hobby, read a book, join a replay, start a thread - do something different, at least for a day.
Rule #7: Enjoy the little things. If you are reading this, chances are you are a very privileged human being. And chances are, you've heard that before. So how does this apply here? Well here's a tip for those of us whose extra privileges might be causing, more stress than privilege: look around. You have people, memories, the delicious smell of a hot meal, the friendly crackle of a backyard fire. These things are all temporary. People die. Memories are forgotten. Food is eaten. Fires are put out. Enjoy these things while you have them - once they're gone, you're going to regret not having done so, and trust me, some regrets just aren't worth it. So enjoy what you have; it'll help you abolish stress and live a much more fulfilling life - because life, really, is about little things.
